A Minority President; One Time phenomenon?

I went a week without writing, and then wrote yesterday. That’s because it was National Coming Out Day, and I felt a need to share my emotions with folks. (confession off the bat, its not today yet, its last night, and I’ve been working all day and just finished eating dinner with my boyfriend and best friend. It was a NCOD dinner of sorts, they tried a new recipe, I made Spanish Rice and drank wine.) The two of them are flirting in the kitchen, the downside to dating a beautiful man, and being best friends with a gay man trapped in the body of a black woman.

I began reading a book while waiting for my Arroz to “pop”, The Kennedys; America’s Emerald Kings, and listening to my Carol King box set of CDs. I need to point out now, that I was trying like mad earlier today to convince someone that I was NOT the stereotypical gay man.

The point I promise is coming.

The book begins by explaining why its different that the others that have been written about the Kennedys. It is the first book apparently that discusses how important it was to the Kennedy Family to maintain their Irish-Catholic heritage, and how much of a barrier it was to them.

It made me think a lot. I have made no surprise that someday I intend to run for president. I at least have said clearly that I have no intention of living my life for much longer without running for some office somewhere. I had this conversation with my boyfriend yesterday (the realy yesterday not the today yesterday, so Tuesday) about whether or not he ever thought he would marry into a political situation, let alone be an activist himself. (We finally settled on him cooking for E-day volunteers, for this cycle. We’ll see if I manage to now screw it up before 2008, before discussing what he will do then.)

They stand before me bickering now (Michelle and Rudy) about who’s turn it is to make cookies lumps on the baking sheet.

The Kennedys had a really tough time, apparently getting elected in this country, as Irishmen, and as Catholics. JFK (I make the sign of the cross) was the first ever minority to be elected president, and to this day the last. He was both the descendant of immigrants (yes we all are, but he was obviously one, immigrant after the terrorism of Columbus, not before or during) as well as a Religious minority.

“Once I thought to write a history of the immigrants in America. Then I discovered that immigrants were America” Historian Oscar Handlin, as quoted by John F. Kennedy in A Nation of Immigrants

New York governor Al smith, known for his progressive programs aimed at helping the city’s immigrants ascend into the middle class, ran for president in 1928. Mary Kelly hoped the old bigotry would be set aside, allowing a well-qualified Catholic to be elected to the highest office in the land. Instead, smith became mired in a Ku Klux Klan-incited effort to scare self-respecting Americans from voting for a “papist,” candidate who supposedly owed his allegiance to the “anti-Christ in Rome” and not his native land.

According to the book, Mary Kelly never voted again. The Kennedys thought about this, when their son/brother/cousin ran for President in 1960.

On the heels of NCOD when I blogged about the blessings of my friends, and family, community of supporters, all who have supported me in being an openly gay man, I am forced to wonder…

I am Catholic, and, though not officially recognized as Catholic by the church, wonder if I could be elected as President.

But the bigger question is this… I am Chicano, Catholic, queer, and not quiet about any of that. What is the likelihood I’ll ever be elected to the State House of Representatives, let alone the Presidency?

Can this country ever handle a gay man as president, no matter how much football I watch (there’s your proof Buddy, I said it to everyone it MUST be true ;-) ?)

Could I get elected, with a partner (even if he is the traditional first-lady baking cookies and everything)?

Could I get elected as a Catholic today? I mean let’s think honestly about this, john Kerry didn’t pull it off… but maybe that was because he wasn’t a very good candidate…

All I know is, I pray to God that I lose my elections because of my political stance, if I have to lose them at all. Not because I have sex with, and fall in love with, men. I hope it is because I believe strongly in social programs, and want to make life better for all people in the world, and not because I do that as a part of my Calling from God being Catholic. I hope it is because, I believe strongly in supporting the networks and safety nets for People of Color, not because I have brown-ish skin, and have the last name Martinez.

I make good arroz, I have a knack for dancing and I easily drop to my knees to make the sign of the cross, at any glimpse of trouble and pain. But those things don’t make me any weaker than an Atheist who tears into a hot dog during a baseball game, while ignoring the needs of his neighbors who look differently than him. It makes me stronger, because I have multiple cultures, communities, and Santos on whom to fall back…

I-I-I-I-I'm Coming Out!!!

Today is National Coming Out Day…

It was seven years ago today, when I officially came out to my friends in school. It is a story many of my friends have heard, and some of whom, remember. I was sitting outside the school, I was a junior, and an un-ordinarily large group of us were eating lunch together. Usually there were a handful of us who ate together, but this day, for whatever reason, there were close to 30 of us eating lunch together. We all knew each other and considered each other friends, through many classes and events, and activities. It is a friend of mine’s birthday. Sarah. Birthdays were a big deal to our group of friends, in fact, maybe that’s why so many of us were eating together. She had opened her presents, and we had sung, and done all the crazy goofy stuff that a traditionally nerdy group of high school students would do for a birthday. I remember one of the gifts so clearly; we had a habit of making up new words to describe situations or items that needed specific, or sometimes new naming. Witch-Matttic was one of the words, there was a big emphasis on making the spelling as random as possible, to keep the words a part of our language. Witch-Matttic described a certain type of shoe, with a pointy toe, and usually involving a heel. The group of us put together words, definitions, and pictures of the entire language we had created thus far, and given it to Sarah, the writer in our group for her birthday; I think we also actually bought her a pair of really cute Witch-mattic shoes, with a buckle, making them more so.

I digress a bit. You see, after we all had our Sarah gift giving time, I stood up to tell the group something. (As I write this my stomach gets all fluttery and tied up, just like that day)
I said to the group, today is National Coming Out Day, and I need to tell you all something. I had forced myself to believe, one year previous, that it would be ok to come out on NCOD, and just days before it happened, Matthew Sheppherd was beaten, and the news was continuously covering what has happening. Needless to say, I wasn’t going to come out after that. (thank God I didn’t, as my mother would’ve freaked out I think, to find out her son was gay the day before national news announced that a man only two or three years older than I was beaten and then died, for being gay.)

When I came out, the only thing I faced was the fierce jealousy of Sarah, whose birthday had been the highlight of the day until that moment I finished that sentence. I am gay. Everyone knew, it was no secret, from my friends, or from the people in school, (though Michelle never knew, I guess, until that evening at Wal-Mart, in the soup isle) that I was queer, but this was the first time I actually said it out loud, to people, in a group, like that. It was heart wrenching. (Good thing you’re reading this instead of witnessing it, I decided to look my best today, in honor of the holiday, and now that I’m crying my make up is running everywhere.)

Don’t worry, this will get political soon enough, I know you’re waiting.

I am honored to have the family I have, and to have the friends I have. There are no secrets in this office, I’m as gay as a goose, and no one on my office staff has anything to say about it at all. My mother is very accepting, having recently met my boyfriend, and (to the best of my knowledge) liking him very much. My best friend in the whole world is sitting behind the table of the Statewide GLBT organization on campus right now, helping other youth to feel comfortable coming out, making them feel comfortable in this world, letting them know they are not alone in this world, and that they have support from both the other members of the GLBT community, and from her. She is a heterosexual woman, loving her friends, her family, and caring not at all about who they fall in love with.

My boyfriend is on campus, doing his fabulous thing, (something that makes me proud no matter what he thinks) helping these youth to come out, and to be brave in the process.

I have to think about all the things I’ve done, and the blessings I’ve been handed in the last seven years, since coming out. I work in politics, with the Democratic Party and candidates from that party, as well as other organizations. I have never had a candidate who treated me differently than other volunteers, or staff. I’ve never had any friction in a work space, on any campaign or organizational staff because of my sexual orientation. I’m quite proud of the things I’ve done, and I won’t say that often.

When I came to work on this campaign, one of the most popular things I’ve encountered was happening, one of my co-workers was calling it my “sexual preference,” and I corrected him. I explained it clearly, preference is a choice between two acceptable options, whereas orientation is not an optional thing, but rather something determined for us. Or, as I said to him, preference is in a bed, rather than an air mattress. Both acceptable places for sex, but one preferred over the other. The drive to have sex with, and more importantly, fall in love with, a man is not a choice. It has been determined for me. After one time explaining this to him, he changed his language, and if he uses preference, he apologizes and corrects himself. The blessing of working with liberals maybe?

My God doesn’t make mistakes. My co-worker constantly refers to the fact that My Pope is, according to Vatican Law, infallible. Well, I don’t necessarily think this is true, but I know my God is. My God created me the way s/he wanted me. Gay. Queer. Fabulous!

Thanks to the people who have so loved, accepted, and understood me in my life. To all my heterosexual friends who have braved a gay bar to hang out with me, knowing for once what its like to be the minority, and maybe be a little uncomfortable even with the alcohol. Thanks to my best friends, Michelle and Ambrosia both who have worked tirelessly to achieve equality for me, and my loved ones, my brothers and sisters. Thanks to my bosses, and candidates, and co-workers, and friends who have made my life so full of variety, richness, and challenges, none of them related to being Queer.

Thanks to everyone I know out there and those I don’t know who have had the courage to come out. Thanks to those of us who come out everyday, by wearing jewelry, shirts, stickers, and such that announce our Orientation to the world. And thanks to those youth, for whom I have so much hope, because you will one day come out. You may know that today is not the day, that now isn’t the time in your life to do so, but someday you will. And that, my siblings, is good enough!

safer schools?

So the Trib headline today was not unexpected. “APS Police seek guns 24/7”

I can’t help thinking, I saw this coming. In light of recent school shootings, APS officers want to be able to have their guns on their persons at all times. Current policy permits them to carry them before and after classes are in session, during the school day though they have to keep their guns locked in gun safes, in the trunks of their cars. They want the school board to re-evaluate their policy on this issue.

I for one cannot understand how people all think that having guns available at all places all the time is going to solve these problems. I am reminded of one of my favorite episodes of the West Wing. The President, and others on his staff are shot at a rally one night. A few days later CJ, the press secretary, is giving a briefing. She points out how many other Americans were wounded or shot in gun related incidents that night. And that if anyone thinks having guns in their homes will stop that, the secret service was armed to the hilt and they still didn’t stop the President and others from being shot.

I am not saying I oppose gun ownership, as I really do support the public basic right to own a gun. (There are lots of caveats on that.)

But what good can a police officer with a gun on campus really do? Are they guaranteed to be near the shooter/violent offender? Is there any evidence that cops with guns on campus decrease violence on campuses?
What is to prevent the police officers from using their power in such a horribly volatile environment, for bad things?

How long will it take before a student is reaching for an ID, or water bottle,a nd gets shot by a police officer, in a hallway?
What will happen to the idea of school safety then?

Just questions….