The Arrogant Atheist

Many people know that I am Catholic. That is an easily summarized slightly watered down description of my Faith, my personal spirituality is much more complicated than that.  But suffice it to say, to the general public who are not practitioners of any older faiths, this is good enough.

I chose to become Catholic, by the way.  For the most part, my dads family wasn’t one I spent much time around, so though they are Catholic, or were when I was growing up, I didn’t get it from them.  My mother’s family didn’t’ attend any church, though we had strong Judeo-Christian beliefs in our family and home, we weren’t church going people.

I personally, and without real influence from others, was called to find a place to strengthen my connection to a spiritual force I felt but hadn’t’ quite identified.  I checked out many churches and religions, and while taking a bit of my faith and understanding from each one I researched, I found myself feeling quite at home with Catholic Mass and the Church. 

Obviously I have my issues with the Church.  I do not like its subjugation of women, or its oppression of homosexuals. I dislike its anti-sex position overall, and many other political things. I also like a lot of political things about the church.  The church calls us to protect our earth and environment, to feed the poor, to house the homeless, and many other things.  Not all Catholics are steadfast in these beliefs, I get that.  Not all of us are steadfast in our beliefs about women or gays.  It happens.  Call me a cafeteria catholic, if you like; I know my relationship with God is strong. 

This, however, is nothing compared to what has been upsetting me most, recently.

The arrogance of SOME atheists.  Let me say, first and foremost, that I am not referring all atheists.  I know plenty who respect my faith, encourage it, I even have an atheist friend who when I’m feeling down reminds me that I probably haven’t been to church in a while or that I should light a candle and spend some time praying.  She knows, that even though she doesn’t’ believe there is appositive outcome from a Divine being; there is a measurable outcome on how I feel.  These are not he atheists I’m talking about.

I mean the ones who have become bigoted in their rant against eh bigotry of “the church.”  They are often liberal(which I am) gay(which I am) feminist (which I am) and angry (which I tend not to be, except in Friday traffic.)  They have decided that their lives are miserable as Queer people, because of Church Sanctioned oppression.    They might be, but then mine might be as well.  I don’t find blame in my life for my hardships, except to blame the idiot friend who suggested another shot, the next morning in a hangover. Or to blame my most recent ex for breaking my heart and being dishonest while doing it.  Hey, I’m working on these things too!

But Yes I find life as a Queer Chicano difficult. Try adding to that, one who dresses as a woman.  No I don’t feel good knowing that I still can’t get married to the person I might choose (not that there is anyone right now) in my hometown like I might want. And yes that hurts me.  And yes that hurts my heart.   I know of people who have committed suicide, because of the pain and suffering in their hearts, from hateful words and angry epithets they were harboring in their broken hearts.  I know there is real pain and suffering because of some religious people and even some religious institutions.

Let me be clear, insulting people of faith because of the things other people of faith have done is disgustingly counter-productive, as well as morally wrong.

I have a friend who was mugged recently. By a Black man. All black men, therefore are thieves and only care about hurting others.

I have a friend who was oppressed recently. By a Catholic Man.  All Catholics are oppressive and only care about subjugation of homosexuals. 

How could one of these statements be OK and the other not?!?!?!  I, personally, can’t stomach the thought of saying either of them with any ounce of belief.  When did we as liberals, free thinking, analytical and rational become so incredibly bigoted? When did we decide it was okay to just blatantly hate people because of their beliefs, while claiming out justification was our own experience being hated for our own beliefs, or sexuality, or body parts, or whatever!?

I never thought that the day would come, over 24 years after I came out, that I would be ashamed to tell people I’m gay.  I’m getting there though. Not because there is ANYTHNG wrong with being gay, at all. But because I am afraid that others will think I am like THOSE gays, who are bigots crying for equality and love and acceptance while throwing bombs of hatred and intolerance. 

I am proud of being gay, for now. I am proud of being a Feminist who has worked at clinics and escorted women, and raised money for abortions, birth control or other reproductive healthcare costs. I am proud of being and HIV/AIDS activist and advocate, as well as a Sex educator and condom distributor.  I am proud to be radically liberal who thinks the Occupy movement had great ideas, who was detained for protesting ward I disagreed with, for knocking on thousands of doors and making thousands of phone calls to help elect people who believe in Choice, Equality, Science based Public Health approaches, Environmental protections, and many other progressive things.

I am proud of all of those things, as well as being Catholic. 

You are not “smarter” than me because you are not religious.

You are not more moral than I am, because you have compassion without a faith structure.

You are definitely not more deserving of respect than I, because you are “free from religion”

If you think so, you should get over yourself, and your arrogance reeks of false confidence.

So to the Arrogant Atheists out there: Get your shit together, get over it, and try being nice, try listening before talking, try calm heads and rational approaches over angry insults and frustrating temper tantrums.  You might change a mind or two. But at the least, if you can’t be an adult-shut the eff up all together.  I need your rants and raves as much as I need them from the next guy, I’m not a parent for a reason, whine to your own.