Identity Crisis... I Challenge You To Think of Something More Fun?

So I posted yesterday, my blog about writing a plan for my departure from NM... I know I have only have two fans, and one of them is loyal, so imagine my surprise when I had a comment on my blog by the time I got to work this morning...

Imagine my surprise more so, when I had an entire email response to it as well. I Love You Girl!!!

She had clearly warned me not to read it at work, mostly because she knows me incredibly well, and yet I did so anyway. For that, I had smudged mascara and eyeliner all day long!!!

Her Email was the sweetest form of flattery... If she had only known...

Quoting her below without her permission, I hope she understands, as I think this warrants further discussion, and I encourage my other reader to jump in on this, (you know who you are, your words have become quite influential for me last couple of weeks especially!!!)

I guess all around, I’ve been overly emotional the past week or so, mostly cuz I’ve been really homesick, but also I’ve lost myself in a couple of mental quandaries about identity and what the hell I’m doing with my life, and reading your blog, I was really quite impressed with your sense of identity, and strength in who you are, and faith, especially in the ability of people to accept you, and I love all of that. And yes, I know that you are not infallible in this, and that you, too, have your moments of, oh shit who am I and what am I doing (having witnessed a couple of them this summer), but really, I think for the most part you are a very strong individual with amazing conviction and sense of self. And I envy that just a little bit.

Well that was the sweetest thing anyone had said to me in a while. Sure Monday Disappointment(P-you remember who this is, B girl{that's your new nickname for the blog}you'll know him as the B-Day present) said a lot of nice things in the conversation during which he told me he didn't want to date me. But those kinds of compliments are never taken to heart.

I really admire your passion, your accomplishments, and your generosity to people you don't know. But I can't commit to having dinner with you once a week, its too much for me right now....THATS where ya lost me!!!

OK OK I'm getting kinda tangential again....

The point is that B-Girls words hit me hard this morning. After Monday Disappointment "dumped" me Friday, Deputy took me out for a night of drunkenness to cope...I spent the rest of the weekend wandering. Not physically, just emotionally... And there it happened, one of the "infallible" moments B-Girl mentioned above...

Its a total identity crisis. And I've been here before. Its a problem. Not a major one, but one none the less...

So While B-Girl is complimenting me on my sens of identity, I'm having a crisis in that department. If she had only known...

So I've begun to write my plan for my trip to DC, but it includes a whole list of things to accomplish, some of which will be knocked out this week. (P-don't ruin the surprise if you leave any comments)

So I'm going to call it a Re visioning of sorts. I'll keep you updated on the progress...

For starters it means more beauty sleep, and I'm failing on that a bit...

goodnight for now, and B-Girl I LOVE you dearly!! I miss you, and I can't wait until we live together in DC and conquer the world you and I!